That's my dad! The little girl is not me, if you're wondering. I took this photo back in 2008. The other day I was looking through some old photos and I came across this one. There's something in this photo that stopped me to reflect on him. My parents divorced when I was about 9 years old so I didn't see my dad a lot. Growing up, my dad was always distant. My mom kissed us every morning before leaving for school but my dad would just tell us to study hard. After my parents divorced, I didn't put much effort into having a relationship with my dad after he moved out. He was more intentional than I was at our relationship. His way of showing love was different and I didn't understand his actions. I have this memory when I was a kid and I was playing outside after school with my siblings. My dad wanted to see us so drove his moped over to find us. When he saw us, he rode his moped right into the school grounds. As he crossed the field where some kids were playing football, I put my head down in embarrassment. I don't remember what happened after that. The only thing I remember about that day was my shame.
What does any of this have to do with this photo? Not much at all but those are the memories that come to mind when I see this photo. The little girl is my niece. She was 5 when my dad passed so she didn't get to know him much. Ever since she was born, my dad loved her. He interacted with her, held her and laughed with her. There's something in this picture that shows my dad's love for his granddaughter. I was photographing my dad when I took this photo and through my camera, I began to see my dad in a new lens. Even now I'm beginning to understand his way of showing love to us.
As I look at this photo and remember my dad riding his moped through a field to see me, I think God redeems memories. In 2011, my dad passed away. There are no more opportunities to build a relationship with him but the way I remember him has changed. That day, when my dad arrived at school with the intention of seeing me, it didn't matter to him if he was doing anything wrong (and maybe illegal?). All he wanted to do was reach me. Embarrassed, I stared at my dad approaching me hoping that he'll come to his senses and turn back around. I looked down in shame but he never took his eyes off me.
